I always said ‘I’m not going to be a shouty mum, I don’t see the need to shout’ and all that other pre-parent rubbish. Ha. ha. ha. How naive I was, parenting a toddler is so much harder than I ever anticipated, I thought that we managed to swerve the Terrible Twos but it looks like we’ve already got a Threenager on our hands!
I’m just going to hold my hands up and say it, sometimes Shouty Mum appears. Not all the time, hardly ever when I really think about it, but there are some days that I feel like I’m constantly shouting and it’s like I’m banging my head against a brick wall.
It’ll be the simplest things that causes the most disruption, refusing to get undressed for bath time, not listening when I ask him to come and put his shoes on, god forbid I ask him to stand still while I put his suncream on! I know they sound like really stupid things to get annoyed about, but when it’s the end of the day or if you’re trying to rush out of the house, those annoyances are well and truly heightened and that’s when Shouty Mum appears. Does it make him do what I say; of course, it doesn’t! I know that shouting doesn’t get you anywhere, but when you’ve got a toddler acting like he rules the roost, it’s hard not to get frustrated!
I used to absolutely love the bedtime routine, getting all cosy and reading him a story before tucking him in, but at the moment it’s a time that I dread. All is fine until he’s meant to get in to bed, and that’s when the games begin! He’ll use any excuse to not go to sleep; I want to be tucked in, I don’t want to be tucked in, I want the door closed, I want the door open, I want another story and the list goes on! If I end up shouting I feel like the worst parent in the world. It’s not even a shout, it’s just a raised voice, but I still come away thinking that all he’s going to have is dreams of me shouting and I’ve somehow scarred him for life by telling him to lie down, I’m fully aware how over-dramatic that sounds haha!
During the day we’re using the naughty step and that seems to be working, when he eventually decides to sit on the blooming thing! I know he’s just testing his boundaries and seeing what he can get away with, but if he could just limit his boundary testing to just once a month, that would be great (wishful thinking!?).
Please tell me I’m not the only one in a constant battle to be the cool calm and collected mum that I’ve always wanted to be, and the Shouty Mum that I hate?
One thought on “The shouty mum”
I never wanted to become one either but sometimes you have too. Theirs a difference between shouting and raising your voice constructively and so long as your doing it to raise a happy healthy and well behaved child there is no issue! Mine is soon to be two and although I very rarely raise my house sometimes you cannot help it and that is ok!
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