I had my first mummy scare a couple of weeks ago– I had to take my baby to the hospital.

Jack had been running a high temp for a few days, Calpol seemed to be doing the trick and aside from being a bit quiet and a bit off his food, he was our normal boy.

On Monday he started throwing up and really wasn’t himself, so I called the doctor and they told me emergency appointments were all they had available so I had to go in at 3pm and wait. When we got there the doctor was, quite frankly, a bit of an arse. He was rude, judged the fact that I hadn’t brought him in sooner (I took him in on Monday, as soon as the surgery told me a space was available), that Calpol wasn’t an effective treatment, and that he didn’t know what was wrong so I should take him to the hospital straight away.

I sat in the waiting room crying and worrying while the receptionist sorted out a referral letter, thinking I was the worst mother in the world and that something was seriously wrong with our boy. I rang Shane in a blind panic, and he jumped on the first train he could and made his way home from his office in London. In the mean time I picked my mum up and off we rushed to the hospital.

I just couldn’t get the doctors words out of my head, no parent should ever feel judged like that, more so at a doctor’s surgery, a place where you’re meant to get help! His temperature started to rise and he was getting more and more drowsy as we sat in the hospital waiting room, he didn’t even perk up when Shane walked through the door – now that’s unheard of! The more out of sorts he was getting, the more I felt like I should have got him seen too sooner, I had such a huge amount of guilt hanging over me for my poorly baby.

After a once over from the amazing paediatric doctors, it turns out that Jack had a severe case of tonsillitis, his little tonsils were red raw and full of puss, but a week of antibiotics cleared it. Once the doctor diagnosed Jack, I had another little sob. Firstly, because I was relieved it was nothing serious, unlike the impression I got from my GP. And secondly, because his words were still ringing in my head, that somehow, I could have prevented Jack’s pain.

His heart rate was a lot higher than it should have been so we were kept in for a few hours for observation before coming home, we left at around 9pm with an extremely overtired bubba!

Even now, weeks later, I still get annoyed thinking about how the doctor spoke to me. I’m a first-time mum, just trying to do what’s best. My child was poorly, I took him to the doctors as soon as I thought it was something to worry about. Parent’s get so much stick for being over-protective and rushing to the doctor at any sign of a sniffle, we’re dammed if you do, dam if you don’t!

*I just want to point out that I know I’m very fortunate to have a healthy boy, and for many parents unfortunately a visit to the hospital is the norm – but it wasn’t for me!